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que sera sera

yep.
so i went to target last weekend or something and bought this box of sangria. it was cheap... like $16 or something and it contains four bottles worth of alcohol. i thought it was a good deal. they had smaller containers of the other varieties of wine (merlot, cabernet, etc.), however not a smaller version of sangria. so, i bought it thinking "how bad could it be?" initially, i thought it was horrible, but now that i think i'm more than halfway through it i can say it has grown on me. haha. lately i've been getting home from work and i go straight to the box wine and pour myself a pint glass worth of this liquid happiness. after i'm done i'll usually pour myself one more. i'm generally good after that. i suppose it doesn't help that leah's new schedule is practically the opposite of mine, so i have to find ways to entertain myself in the evenings. wine is making a comeback y'all!

so with all this free time i have now i've taken up making mix cds. well, my interest in this was initially sparked by a dear friend to whom i've promised a mix for years (i think) and one day i actually got to it. however, i felt like the one i made for her was genre specific (kinda) and so now i'm making the same general mix in a different genre. some background on these mixes... so when i was going to UH somebody sent me an email asking me to make a mix and call it my life soundtrack. i don't remember who it was, but i thank that person greatly. it has made the mix making process quite enjoyable. anywho, it goes like this:

opening scene:
dreaming about someone scene:
waking up scene:
happy friends scene:
driving scene:
action/fight scene:
chase scene:
happy love scene:
choreographed dance scene:
mellow scene:
sex scene:
angry/bitter scene:
breakup scene:
evil/revenge scene:
contemplation scene:
sad/breakdown scene:
death scene:
funeral scene:
nostalgia scene:
closing credits:

the order is kind of weird, but it generally works out. the initial mix i made still holds pretty true as far as my favorite happy love scene and what not. however, the ones i've been making recently are based on "present day" situations or contain more present day songs of interest. the one i made for the chum was more indie-ish and the one i'm working on now is more along the trip hop/r&b/soul tip. good chill tunes that have been making me bounce my head up and down for at least nine years. they touch my heart quite deeply as well as i associate them with specific people who have impacted the way i see the world and the way i interpret the things i encounter.

anyway, my vacation starts today. i was supposed to be off since monday, but because i had no plans to go anywhere i decided to give back some days. however, i've been regretting that decision since monday. the post office has been asshole-ish and i've worked 40+ hours so far (our work week starts on saturdays, but vacation starts on monday. it's stupid). nevertheless, i'm free! plans for the free days: hang out with mindy (she just moved back yesterday. happy times!), breakfast at town, art projects, shopping for wedding attire, go to my best friend's wedding (and every other event she has going on this weekend), birthday karaoke party for jenni, bike around, take pictures, drink... alright, so basically the things i would do on any day off...

... so let the fun begin.

in the daylight everywhere feels like home

yep.
so i went to a matt&kim show this week and it was awesome. i mean, i love m&k is it is. their music is just so happy and it's excellent workout music. it's just great that two people can make music like that. they had so much energy throughout their whole show. and i would've paid the $25 for the tickets to go see them, but since it was at aloha tower it is so much easier to just watch any shows there for free from the upstairs balcony. afterwards, however, i wish i did just pay to go see them. if i knew i wasn't going to pay i would've brought a better zoom lens for my camera. i expected to be up close and personal though. ah well... it was still good times.

other goodness, there's finally an app for iphone that can let you tune in on radio stations... and not just locally. so i can finally get ktuh on the windward side in a nice clear, non-static sort of way. and i can listen to other college radio stations worldwide. stoked!

i bought a bocce ball set the other weekend. it's kind of like curling, but can be played on grass, sand, wherever. it makes for a good beer drinking and competitive gaming experience with others. i hope to play on sundays when i'm not scheduled to work, which unfortunately wasn't today.

anywho, at the m&k show i was talking to my friend about blogs. she's thinking about starting a drinking/bar/food/service blog and was asking whether we thought tumblr or blogspot were better and i have no idea if those are good. i remember using blogger back in the day to talk about drug experiences (specifically ecstasy pills, hahahah!), but other than that it's been livejournal and it's all about rambling. but yeah, so it got me wondering if i could write about one general topic often... and i don't think i can. my mind is all over the place and i don't feel like i have enough knowledge about one specific topic that i could write about it often enough.

alright. my timer just went off... you know what that means? my cheese pizza is ready for consumption. yum.

i'm on another planet with you

yep.
alright. i haven't used this in forever and tonight i kind of remembered why i started doing this in the first place. my thoughts have been all over the place and i need a mental vacation or at least some sort of outlet to kind of type out loud and perhaps try and sort things out.

overall, things have been okay and now i'm 30 and i feel like things kind of hit a wall.
things that will be giving me grey hair before the end of the year:
-my job has been really inconsistent with my scheduling and the hours i'm getting. it's generally slow in august and september, but the lack of customers has been ridiculous. that and there has been a substantial drop in first class mail (letters/large envelopes). i'm feeling safe at least through the holidays, but my future after that seems extremely uncertain.
-my mother and aunt are trying to sell my grandparent's house by the end of the year. i don't think this will really happen... maybe next year. i mean, they still have cleaning to do and carpets to change, but nevertheless, the market is bad and i don't know how many people will be willing to shell out $600,000 for a house in waialua. it's a little too far out there.
-my mom wants to help me and my brother out with her portion of whatever she gets from selling the grandparent's house. she was going to give me enough to put down 20% on a condo. this is the part where stress starts building. so apparently, to qualify for a $300k loan i would need to prove that i bring home $3600/month, which i don't do. my mom wants me to shoot for a 2 bedroom/2 bath condo, which costs more thatn $300k. the whole process seems like it's never going to happen. even if by some miracle i do qualify for that kind of loan, my job is so unstable i don't know if i'd be able to pay the monthly mortgage, property tax, utilities, insurance, maintenance fees, and whatever else you have to pay when you become a home owner.

i did have a long talk with my mother the other day about my concerns and she really is so positive. it does make me feel better knowing that my mom still thinks so highly of me and is willing to support me, even though she knows i want to do these major life changes on my own.

okay, anyway, i'm watching d.e.b.s for the 1,000th time and i still love it. cutie lesbians. or more like hottie jordana brewster. gotta love it.

also, it's about 2am and i don't work til 3pm. it would be just my luck that my supervisor calls me at 4am to come in early. staying up this late makes it feel like the good old days... except i'm not watching late night tbs... by now the second episode of "saved by the bell" would be ending and some cheesy movie would be starting.

little bit

yep.
the days are flying by. it's hard to believe that it's february already. this winter has been filled with people coming and going. i feel like my friend circle here keeps shrinking. it makes me sad in a way... a kind of loneliness creeping in. yet, i'm extremely happy that they're off doing what they need to do to be happy, successful, whatever they feel they need to do. the true ones stay close, no matter how far away they are... and those are the ones that matter.

work is the same as always. still working mostly six days a week, with usually a monday or tuesday off. sometimes i hate this job and sometimes it's alright. it kind of depresses me to think that this might possibly be what i do for the rest of my life. i mean, the money is great, but i hate to think that that is all that matters. don't get me wrong, i love being able to buy the things i want. i'm actually considering buying an apartment within the next two years. this feat will seriously be the biggest event of my life if it actually follows through. however, money doesn't buy sustainable happiness. i suppose i want a deeper fulfillment that money can't buy. i just need to figure out what i need to do get it, or what it even is. i keep thinking "if i could go back to school, what would i study?" and i just can't think of anything. maybe i should focus on finding things i can do besides work to make me feel something other than contentment. digital photography isn't it, that's for sure. i need more hands on work. something that requires more anal retentiveness. ugh. must figure this out this year.

leah and i made a resolution to cook at least once a week. we slacked the first month, but today was as good a day as any to start. i made mac n cheese, which came out excellent as always. can't really go wrong with kraft. haha. my mom got leah a subscription to better homes and garden (cute right?) and there's all sorts of healthy recipes in there. i think we'll try them out. i'll make it a point to share the good recipes on lj.

the cats are cute as always. i adore them. just thought i'd share.



oh. and i'm going to also share songs that i've had stuck in my head lately.

party like it's 1999... or 2010.

yep.
it's been quite the year and i haven't updated in forever.

december was a horrible month filled with non-stop 12 hours days practically every day. i think i had maybe 3 days off all month. nevertheless, i'm hoping for goodness next year. i've made some personal resolutions and hope to live up to them. however, i haven't been able to in the past years so i'm not crossing my fingers on it.

supposedly i'm going to the misfits concert tonight, but really i'd just like to kick it at a bar and drink my way into the new year surrounded by my girl and my friends that i love.

anywho, time to get my drink on. hope everyone has a great/safe night. i'll see y'all next year.

much love.

amsterdam: day 4

yep.
-was supposed to wake up early today, but we woke up at noon. that weed man... i still woke up feeling it. we mapped out a route for our sneaker shopping agenda. we hit up 290 square meters, seventy five, tom's skate shop, concrete, patta, and front runner (which is like a footlocker). anywho, i found some shoes i liked at two different stores, but in one they didn't have my size and the other... well, i just wasn't completely sold. i ended up buying some "hub" leather high-top sneakers at front runner. they're nice, but i'm feeling kinda like i bought them just to say i bought sneakers in amsterdam. eh. ah well. cost: €110
-rode up to the green house to do more wifi and weed. we finished up the remainder of the super lemon haze. we got the munchies so we bought a ham and cheese toastie (pretty much the best grilled cheese sandwich ever) and two cokes. oh wait, this happened between patta and front runner. we went back to the green house after and ordered another toastie, this time ham/cheese/tomato, two cokes, and some swoopwafel taart (or something like a cheesecake). so so delicious. i'm in love with these sandwiches. i wish i got them earlier. cost for earlier run: €8 cost second time: €12
-came back to the hotel to rest. leah fell asleep and i watched some movie called "high crimes" and then a show titled "how to have sex" which had an hour long segment on BDSM. talk about no censorship here. it was quite informative.
-leah got up and we went back out for one last bike ride. actually, it was more for me to get one last drink of my favorite beer (moreeke) at the majestic restaurant. it was beautiful all day for biking. and even tonight it wasn't too cold (the last couple days were freezing). cost: €14
-falafel craving again! so we hit up the places closest to our hotel. this time i will say that it wasn't so good, but it satisfied my needs. cost: €10
-we turned in our bikes and then hung out outside the hotel next to the canal and smoked the last of the Chocolope weed. it was a sad sad part of the trip. we knew from the beginning that we wouldn't be able to bring a used pipe home, so we bought a cheap little wooden one and smoked out of it the whole time here. but we knew the time had come for us to part ways. we finished up the weed and leah tossed the pipe into the canal. i took a picture of it and it's kind of creepy cos the pipe is just suspended in mid air.
-we still have about 0.5g of G-13 Haze lying around. hard to believe considering how much i feel like we smoked during this trip. leah's gonna try to bring it home in her pocket. i'm freaking out about it, but she says she'll just play dumb about it. it's not enough to get her seriously in trouble, but still. i'm paras. ah well... we'll see how far she gets. we might just leave it for the janitor. they've been doing a good job restocking the fridge, changing the towels, and straightening the beddings.

it's been an awesome trip and i'm not ready to go back to work. but i think i'm ready to go home. i miss the cats. well, maybe i could spend a couple more days here, but it's getting cold. time for some beach and sun before going back to the bump and grind.

oh. and we gotta leave for the airport in an hour and i feel like it's pointless to try to sleep. besides... i gotta find some way to pass out tomorrow on the flights. it goes like this:
ams-london
london-LA!!!
LA-hnl

god. it's gonna be a long long day.

uploaded to flickr.

Sep. 17th, 2009

yep.
birthday day!

-woke up late... around 1130am, which is good cos the city doesn't really open til noon.
-biked over to the pancake bakery with ease. no getting lost today. i had a banana, chocolate sauce, and whipped cream pancake and coffee. leah had a strawberry and whipped cream tiny pancake (a.k.a. zomerpoffertjes) and still water. it was onolicious. alicia keys and paris hilton would back me up on this one. (their pictures are on the website). wish i had some crispy bacon to go along with it. cost: €20
-rode over to the van gogh museum. it was cool. felt like it was something i had to see while i was here. cost: €25
-rode around vondelpark, which is like the amsterdam version of central park, but way cooler cos it's full of bicyclists whizzing around. and you can smoke freely, which we did at a park bench.
-headed north to the green house coffeeshop, smoked more G-13, and drank a hot chocoloate. oh. i forgot to mention this yesterday, but this coffeeshop has a glass floor with koi fish swimming around underneath. it's pretty sick. and leah noticed today that one of the fish was orange and white checkerboard color. they also have free wifi, which is turning up to be harder to find than we initially thought. cost: €3
-attempted to eat dinner at this place called toscanini since the internet and my travel book both recommended it. but it was booked solid (leah thought they were being racist again), so we walked away and a couple houses down there was another italian restaurant called il fiore. i was getting tired of eating bunk dutch food and figured no one can really mess up italian food. leah and i both got some steak meals and it was delicious. so, good choices there. cost: €40
-feeling extremely round we headed back to the hotel and i immediately comatosed. major kanaks up in amsterdam.
-i awoke about 4 hours later and still felt stoned. G-13 is crazy. feeling slightly awake though, i convinced leah into smoking more G-13, walking around the red light district, and picking up falafel. we walked down the main strip of the red light district and leah couldn't take it. it just feels so skeezy there. so we headed back to this falafel shop near our hotel. however, at a distance away it looked closed and i was on a mission to get falafel damnit. so we went back to the red light district cos i remembered seeing one open still. i was more interested in falafel than naked chicks. priorities. you know how it is. anywho, found the falafel place. by this time leah felt more comfortable in the red light district so she sat outside and looked around while i waited for the food. cost: €15 (2 falafels, fries, small ben&jerrys chocolate brownie fudge ice cream)

so that's it for this day. tomorrow we're on a sneaker hunt and just overall enjoying our last real day here.

flickr uploaded.

amsterdam: day 2

yep.
-woke up at 8:30am with working internet. uploaded pics to flickr.
-rented bikes from our hotel and attempted to go towards the museum district. however, got lost and ended up nowhere near where we thought we were. had to ask for directions twice and saw sam ronson (lindsay lohan's ex-girlfriend) walking her dog along one of the canals. cost for bikes: €35/day
-finally found foam fotographiemuseum. saw selected works of charlotte dumas, koen wessing, and saskia dommisse. it was nice seeing photos in a gallery. it's been a while. especially good photographs. those are hard to come by. cost of admission: €15
-rode our bikes to the homomonument and the anne frank huis. the homomonument was a disappointment. we didn't even recognize it when we walked by it the previous evening. i guess i expected something more phallic. the anne frank huis, as plain as it is, still makes you feel something... sad/curious/scary. i dunno how to describe it.
-rode our bikes back down to the museum district to try to find food and hit up viva la vie (some lesbian bar that was recommended to us). no luck finding food and viva la vie was closed. when the bar finally opened we discovered that it didn't serve food.
-we rode our bikes back to the city centre and ate lunch at the soup kitchen. i had tomato soup while leah had cream of mushroom. it was okay. not great. ordered a coke, it was warm. cost: €11
-enroute back to the hotel we stopped by a coffeeshop to smoke some of the weed we purchased the previous day. we got there, ordered coffees and leah took one hit then the weed "bartender" informed us that there was no smoking inside, only outside. we thought the rule was that smoking was allowed indoors, but apparently not. it is legal to smoke outside... joint or pipe. we also found out from the bartender that most people in amsterdam smoke joints mixed with tobacco because that's just the way they grow up smoking it. we think it's weird that you'd want to taint the wonderful taste of weed with tobacco, but it makes sense if you're trying to make your weed stash last longer. we finished our coffee and took a couple hits of the pipe before heading back to the hotel. cost: €3
-leah took a long nap and i watching german mtv and got caught up on internet usage.
after she woke up we rode over to the area with the dope coffeeshops and attempted to eat dinner at a soul food restaurant called harlem. we got in sat down and asked if they were still serving dinner (our guide book showed that dinner was served til 10pm and it was already 920pm). the waitress said yeah, took our drink order, then never came back to take our dinner order. i was getting super irras so i paid for my drink and we walked out. cost: €2.80
-frustrated we walked over to another bar/restaurant called stout! there we ordered this mini 10-course dinner thing. it was filled with a mixture of their menu (menu posted in flickr pics). it wasn't the best food ever. it was actually kind of on the verge of not so good, but i stomached it. i was disappointed cos i wanted to eat a good dinner. i am craving something satisfying... and it just hasn't been fulfilled yet. hopefully tomorrow. cost: €71
-after dinner we headed over to the green house coffeeshop. i got a coffee and leah bought 0.25g of Super Lemon Haze (overall winner cannibus cup 2008). this stuff is definitely the best thing we've smoked. tasty, uppity but no paranoia, the giggles, nice body stone. yum. craving dessert, we ordered a triple chocolate cake, which came to us ala mode. so good. weed: €3 coffee: €2 cake: €4
-nearing 1am they kicked us all out and we biked home on empty streets as fast as we could cos it was freezing (maybe high 50s). well, maybe not freezing, but i definitely didn't bring an appropriate jacket for these kinds of temperatures.

-new uploads on flickr.

amsterdam: day 1

yep.
flights:
hnl-sfo: slept the minute we took off til we landed. awesome.
sfo-iad: same as the above. the time just flew by.
iad-ams: longest part ever! i was so cold i kept shivering on the plane. i was using two blankets and just couldn't get comfortable.

landed in amsterdam and had some issues figuring out how to buy train tickets. apparently mastercard is used more than visa here. unfortunately, i brought only visas. but got it squared away (had to pay €0.50 more). the train was quick... maybe 15 minutes from schipol to amsterdam centraal. after asking securitas for help with directions we found our hotel (the grand hotel amrath). our room wasn't gonna be ready til noon (it was 830am) so we checked in and they secured our bags while we walked around the city.

-we R food n' bar. had breakfast. free wifi. leah had a bacon pancake, which was more like a crepe. i had a mediterranean breakfast, which consisted of a tomato and mushroom slice, feta cheese, a corn/cabbage salad, sun-dried tomatoes, toast, over-medium eggs, and crispy bacon (canadian style). it was delicious. drinks: bottled still water, coffee. cost: ~€28
-dampkring coffeeshop. bought 0.5g of Chocolope (2008 cannibus cup winner). awesome stone. got me talking all sorts of bubbles. good chill with a not so long lasting effect. a little giggles. drink: coffee. cost: €5 for weed, €1.50 for coffee
-majestic restaurant. bought the beer (moreeke... pronounced more-rey-ka) i've been dreaming about since i was with my mom in amsterdam back in 2003. so good. a little bit of sweetness, but with a nice aftertaste. cost: €19
-while heading back to the hotel, leah had to use the restroom. apparently establishments here don't let you use the restroom unless you buy something, so we ended up getting more coffee at this dive bar (cafe de zeevaart) in the red light district. they were playing american oldies on the jukebox. it reminded me of hanks or smiths union in chinatown. cost: €2
-finally hit up the hotel room to get some rest. king size bed with lots of pillows. free fully stacked minibar. 32" flat screen tv. deep tub with bulgari bath products. yeah. 5 star to the fullest. actually, the hotel itself looks like a evil mansion from the outside... something that we caught ourselves saying, "is that our hotel?" when we were walking up.
-after napping we wandered the nighttime streets. got kinda lost looking for gay shit to do. ended up heading back to the coffeeshop area we saw earlier. hit up barney's this time. bought 1g of G-13 Haze. this shit is crazy good. mellow, but extremely long lasting with mad munchie effects. drink: iced coffee. cost: €14 for weed, coffee: €3
-post-smoking hunger kicked in hardcore so we hit up a falafel shop, shaorma 42 snacks. it was the most delicious falafel sandwich i've had in a long time... and i'm not just saying that cos i was stoned out of my head. it was better than the ones at the olive tree cafe and the fat greek, but not as good as the one at sultan's market in chicago. drink: dr. pepper. cost: €4.50
-stopped at a dessert shop on the way back to the hotel. bought a tiramisu, chocolate cake, and baklava. cost: €9
-got back to the hotel and had a dessert munchie sesh while watching german mtv. it was a nice to wind down after such a busy day.

now it's morning and we got bike riding and museums on the agenda. hopefully the internet is working tomorrow and i can continue posting every ridiculous thing. i just wanna remember this trip and i know i'll forget the details.

photo journal at flickr